Letting Go

Sometimes, one post flows into another and then into another. So much of what we deal with in life is tied together, one thing affecting another, a virtue of one the basis of many, and so it goes today. I wrote about courage yesterday, a broad topic that can be applied specifically to many areas of life. A friend and mentor of mine posted a quote in response and I think it fits perfectly and ties in to what I’m writing about today. The quote, from Thucydides, is “The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage.” Written thousands of years ago, this quote still holds its own today. We are still human, still struggling, still learning. With courage, comes freedom, and with freedom comes happiness. I couldn’t agree more. Taking it one step further, when we learn to let go, it takes an act of courage that in turn offers us freedom and consequently happiness. Lets take being a parent for example. One of the toughest acts a parent can undertake is finding the courage to let go of their children, nurture them yes, but let them go and find their way in the world. Let them go and screw up and make mistakes but be there for them when they need someone to fall back on. As parents, we know its not easy to let go, but the more we do, and the earlier we start, the better off our children will be as they learn to navigate the world on their own with the skills we taught them.

Then there is the other act of letting go, of knowing when we have served our time to its fullest and it is time to let go and step off the main stage. How many times do we see politicians and leaders getting on in age, refusing to take a step back and let the younger generation step in. They are holding on to the past, to who they were, and claiming that they find joy in what they are doing. I would posit that after a certain time, they could find more joy in letting go and letting others step in. If we have lived our lives to their fullest, found courage to act in the most beneficial ways throughout our life, and not let opportunities pass us by, we should have no problem finding the courage to step back as we grow older. I look up to those who have found the courage and grace to say enough is enough and to know when their time has past. They are the role models we should look to, the ones who set the example of living a well rounded life such that they don’t need to hold on in order to keep going. Those are the people I strive to be like when I get older, to have the foresight and the courage to step back when necessary and let another generation take charge. It takes self awareness, it takes virtue, it takes a whole lot more than most people have within themselves, and perhaps that is why its such a rarity to see people in power relinquish that power for the greater good. Its even rarer these days and I only hope that I have the courage and grace myself to follow in their footsteps as I grow older.

The act of letting go is not just about children and when we age, but for many things in our life. Its about having the courage to let go of the past, to let go of grudges, to let go of physical things, to let go of as much as possible. Sometimes, the more we have, the harder we will fight to keep it. When we have the courage to let go, as the quote says, we find freedom, and then follows happiness. I find that the more I let go of the little things, the easier it is to let go of the larger things. With my children, I know when the time comes to actually let them fly, I may be hesitant, but the small acts of letting them go when they are younger will help me let them fly as they grow older. It takes a lot of effort, but it is definitely worth it. So what can we let go of now that will help us down the road? I know for me, it is stuff right now. I went through my closet last week and got rid of a large pile of clothes that I used to be attached to but realized I would never wear again. Was it necessarily courageous? No, but maybe it had a touch of it in there. And the effect? All positive. What can we let go of that is holding us back? What attitudes do we harbor that are constricting and refraining us? How can we find the courage to let go of these things? Read more, talk to people, start practicing the small acts of courage that will grant you freedom and in turn happiness.