Losing Oneself

I feel like it used to be so much easier to “lose myself”, meaning it used to be much easier to get so involved in a task or activity or even work that time would slip on by, I could lose track of all else around me, and devote my whole attention to one thing and one thing only. Its not so easy to do that anymore. I still manage, but everything around us has been so ramped up and over scheduled that our minds seem to be darting between all the other things we need to do that we can’t focus on what’s in front of us. Either that or accompanied with it is our phone, our tether to everything else that dings and chimes and chirps all day long, begging for our attention, distracting us, and driving our attention directly into the ground. It is often during this time of year that my own attention gets pulled in what seems like 8000 directions and it takes extra will power to get myself into a place where I can “lose myself”, forget about everything else around me, and focus on the task at hand. It takes extra will power that sometimes I don’t feel I have and I find myself constantly fighting the pull of everything else just to remain focused.

I think its a little sad that many people, including myself sometimes, have a hard time “losing ourselves” in our work, a hobby, or anything else worthwhile. I find there are some ways to reign myself back in, grasp my attention as it dissipates and wanders and direct it back to where its needed. One simple way I do this is I never take my phone off of vibrate. Any little ding, chirp, or chime would drive me even more up a wall and destroy any attention I have. I have it in a pouch on my belt where even when it does vibrate, it is subtle and often times I don’t even feel it. This will frustrate my wife quite often when she is trying to call me, but its the same for everyone, my attention needs to be directed at what’s in front of me, nothing else. I return phone calls when I can and respond to texts only on a break. Even with that, my mind needs to be reigned in sometimes as well, pulled back from thinking about everything else that I need to do. I try to devote the time while I’m driving to thinking about all the other tasks that I need to do, but while I am at work, with my children, or involved in a hobby or reading, I attempt to focus on what’s right in front of me. The times when I can lose myself most easily are when I’m hiking or at work painting, the methodical nature of walking or the rhythm of painting can be calming and soothing and assist in helping me lose myself. Its liberating when it happens and I try to cultivate those moments whenever possible. When I can accomplish that, stress seems to diminish and worry goes away.

I feel more people need to increase their attempts at losing themselves in an activity. Losing ourselves doesn’t even mean not thinking, its more about focused thought, directed at what’s in front of us or allowing it to contemplate a larger problem in detail. These are the times when we can accomplish the most and are incredibly productive, when time flies and the world around us disappears. These are the moments I live for, the ones I strive to foster every day and as often as possible throughout the day. I truly hope that more people strive to cultivate these moments as well, to help themselves by losing themselves in something, anything. By losing ourselves, we gain perspective, and when we gain perspective, we increase our capacity to understand and be empathetic with others. Only then can we grow and move forward. So lets all try losing ourselves a little more, becoming a better version of ourselves by increasing our focus and pushing out all the garbage that drags at us.