My Independent Daughter

I must admit, I struggled with the title for my post today. As I was pondering it over the course of today, there was a big part of me that kept wanting to write “Tomboy Daughter”, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the term ‘Tomboy’ pigeon holes an individual, limits them in how they are perceived, and so restricts in a sense who they can become. When she was younger and she wore all her brother’s old clothes, it was easier for me to envision utilizing that term, but now that she is in middle school, she has evolved beyond that. She is a strong girl who despises dresses, anything pink or purple, and glittery accessories. Instead, she wears earth tones plus, pants or shorts, mostly plain shirts, and still has no interest in getting her ears pierced. Yet she does care about how she looks, taking care of her hair every morning and spending time to look her best, minus any makeup which she also despises.

This is my daughter who played with Barbie dolls for years, still builds and plays with legos at the age of 12 almost 13 in middle school, and just this past weekend had the backpack blower on clearing our lawn of leaves. She is strong and determined and is willing to try anything, including the harder yard work, all because she was bored. And even while operating the backpack blower with her ear plugs in, she had her nice leggings on and her hair done. Not long after, she was operating the log splitter with my son and I. It is fantastic to see her grow, be a girl in many ways, but not be afraid to be different, to try things that in the past only a man would do, and not care what others think. Although, to be fair, I do think she cares at least a little about what others think, but she has a way of sitting with it, talking it out and moving past it that I don’t see many other girls her age doing.

At the end of the day, she will always be my little girl, the one who comes running over and despite her growing size, will climb in my lap and drape her arms around my neck. My little girl who as she grows is becoming a wonderful young lady who stands out from the rest, not just because she doesn’t wear pink or purple, but because of her nature, her stubbornness, her resilience, and her drive to do well. Top that off with her ability to meet new people, create new friendships, and laugh deeply and I see more than a little bit of me in her. When she was first born, I had no idea what to expect having a girl, and I still marvel at the changes she has undergone and still keeps going through, and I still don’t know where she will end up. All I do know is that if she keeps up being the strong, independent, courageous, open minded girl she is right now, she can go as far as she wants, and I will only support her as she grows.